Congratulations! You did it. You secured the ring. You’ve got a wedding date locked in. Your deposits for the venue have been submitted.
You’re checking off everything on the list to ensure your big day goes off without a hitch.
But, let me ask you this:
Have you done the inner work, too, in preparation for joining your life with your partner’s?
Why the Inner Work Matters
You see, marriage is more than just a piece of paper and calling your partner “hubby” or “wifey.” It’s more than waking up together every day.
I know because once upon a time, I was married.
But like so many couples, my ex-husband and I didn’t realize there was so much more to a successful marriage than love.
Finances, communication, intimacy, emotional health … the list of things we weren’t prepared for was long. And that’s even with premarital counseling.
Premarital Counseling Isn’t Enough
It’s not just about asking yourself the obvious questions – do we both want kids? Will someone stay home, or will both of us work?
It’s about asking some of the deeper questions that truly reveal your preparedness for marriage.
Yes, it’s easy to say those vows in the moment and promise to be with each other during good times and bad, but what happens if things get rough?
What happens when your foundation crumbles after something your partner did or didn’t do?
Will your views on finances change if your partner suddenly becomes unemployed?
Do you actually know why you want to get married? Or how you will show up differently as a partner once you’re a wife vs. just a fianceé or girlfriend?
Pre-marital counseling can help with closing the gap between your views and your partner’s and working through any differences or disconnects.
But what it won’t touch on are the individual parts of yourself you still need to reckon with.
Why You Need to Ask Yourself These Questions Before Marriage
It wasn’t until I was divorced with a broken heart that I realized what was missing in my marriage: the work I needed to do on myself.
Now, I dedicate my time to helping couples just like you ask themselves the right questions to ensure their marriage lasts through thick and thin.
While no marriage is perfect, you can set yourself up for success by getting clear on what work you need to do on yourself.
Inside my book, The Top 8 Questions Every Woman Should Ask Herself Before Saying “I Do,” I dive into that inner work.
If you’re considering marriage, this book will open your eyes to what you need to know about yourself before you say “I do.”
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Before you think premarital counseling is enough to prepare your relationship for marriage, do you know the answers to these questions?