The Seven Year Itch in Marriage – Tips to Get Through It!
Are you dreading the seven year itch in your marriage?
For those who haven’t the slightest idea what it is, it marks the point in a relationship where things can quickly go downhill. The idea is that after being with the same person for seven years, you reach a point where you don’t get the same pleasures anymore. In turn, you may not give as much to the relationship any longer and start pursuing other avenues of happiness – which in many cases, is in the arms of someone new.
Now, everyone that’s been together more than seven years hasn’t cheated, of course, but the state of the relationship can take a serious decline as one or both parties try to chase that newness they’re interested in. The good news is that there are solutions to getting through the rough patch and building your marriage to last seven years and beyond.
Here’s some advice to get through the seven year itch period in your marriage:
- Remember the Foundation of Your Friendship.
You were friends before you were ever married. Sometimes, it may be necessary to get back to that foundation and do some maintenance. Try to focus on the positive things about your spouse and the things that made you fall in love to begin with.
Do things you once enjoyed together. But more important, be committed to learning your spouse for who they are now. They have changed over the past seven years, and it may require some catching up to understand who they are today.
- Break the Pattern.
Seven years is a long time to be with someone. To spend 2,555 days with the same person doing the same thing, can get boring. You may need to assess your day-to-day routine and interaction with your spouse to determine how you can break up the monotony and throw some fun and spontaneity into the mix. Get away on the weekends, have more date nights during the week, or even play hooky from work once in a while to just get it on.
- Maintain Your Identity.
Sometimes in relationships, we lose ourselves in order to find a new normal with the ones we love. While becoming one does mean “dying to self” and becoming one, it doesn’t mean you should completely lose yourself in the process. Your spouse is not meant to fulfill every need you have – including happiness. By focusing on yourself and things you enjoy, you and your spouse can build a deeper connection that allows you to appreciate each other even more.
- Be Honest.
If it’s you that’s feeling the seven-year itch, being honest and upfront is the best approach. Talk to your spouse about how you’re feeling and what you believe needs to change. This provides them with the opportunity to voice their opinions and work with you to make the necessary changes required to see your marriage through to better days.
Beat the seven year itch and enjoy many years of happiness!
You might think that being with one person for years would get easier with time, but the truth is it requires 100 percent effort. Your interests, wants, goals, and even some of your needs, will change.
In a marriage, this means reinventing the wheel over and over again. Finding new ways to fall in love, spending time together, and maintaining your own identity are all imperative solutions to getting through that seven-year itch.
