Come close and get comfy. It’s time to talk about intimacy, and couples bearing it all between the sheets! I mean financial spreadsheets, of course.
As unflattering as it is to mention love and money in the same breath, this elusive taboo needs to be addressed.
You see, we don’t talk about money with our partners enough, and waiting until you get hitched might be too late. And marriage happiness depends on avoiding the pitfalls couples get caught in by discussing four crucial conversations about money.
Topic #1: Financial Personalities
For some, money is highly valued and used as a measure of success. For others, it is merely a means to an end. So, uncovering your partner’s money mindset and how they emotionally relate to it helps you to better understand them.
Their mindset usually stems from their upbringing and what role money played in their lives. Listen, I know you’d rather exchange kisses than credit scores, but your finances and romances need to be equally yoked.
So, the first question is …
What’s your relationship with money?
Topic #2: Money Management
Here, you want to get into the nitty gritty of your spending habits, budgets and emergency planning, or lack thereof, and any other financial obligations you may be tied to, like child support or alimony.
Another critical albeit uncomfortable conversation to have is money owed. From debt types to total balances to the way you’re handling payments – aggressively paying it off or barely making the minimum – these sticky-icky TMI moments are relevant and obligatory disclosures for tying the knot.
Be honest when answering …
Do you have a plan for building wealth?
Topic #3: Income & Responsibilities
Now we begin to bridge the gap by merging both incomes for totaling monthly cash flow and paying bills. Are you splitting everything 50/50? Is a percentage method more practical or will you divide and conquer expenses by category?
Then, there’s the matter of joint accounts. Some couples go for a mine-yours-ours system, while others go all in with a one-and-done account.
For the next question, just remember: no heat, no judgment …
How do you feel about prenuptial agreements?
Topic #4: Life & Financial Goals
Ah, at last: The wedding. That’s right, you’ll have to talk about the size, the cost and the dealbreakers. (For a lavish ceremony, of course, not the marriage.) Truth is, there’ll need to be some compromise to make you both happy. You see, most couples regret accumulating deep debt from one day of saying “I do,” so make sure the wedding of your dreams is within reason of your financial reality.
But the wedding’s only the beginning. What other magic moments do you hope to achieve? Do they include home ownership, starting a business, having kids or going back to school? Be prepared and start mapping out your three-, five- and ten-year plans, so you come out winning!
Finally, the most important question to ask is …
What steps do we need to take to make our shared and individual dreams come true?
Want to walk down the aisle fearless and fierce? Unveil your blindspots of limiting beliefs to make smart moves in love and finance by asking yourself some crucial questions before answering, “I do.” Go here: