Planning Your Wedding with Your Partner
As little girls, we often plan-out aspects of our wedding from beginning to end. If you’re like me, when you fell in love with your first boyfriend (I was 16 at the time), you began thinking about the type of dress you would wear, where you might get married, and even the types of food you wanted to eat.
I mean, there has always been this unspoken idea that a wedding is all about the bride… right? Wrong…. Your wedding day is supposed to be about you and your fiancé joining hands to become one, and therefore, he too should feel happy about the events to occur.
Include Him…Even When He Says Not To
When my fiancé proposed to me, I immediately began watching all the wedding reality shows, clipping out ideal wedding dresses from bridal magazines and even calling venues to reserve a date. Every step of the way I asked him, “Hey honey, what do you think about this, or what do you think about that?” And every step of the way he said, “This is your day, do what you want, I’ll just show up.”
At the time I thought it was sweet, that he only cared about getting married to me and not all of the specifics…. That is until about two months before we were scheduled to walk down the aisle.
I had scheduled for my husband and the groomsmen to go and be fitted for their suits. Now mind you, I showed him pictures of ideas I had for suits and he brushed it off. However, when he showed up for the fitting, he came home pitching what I’d like to call, a man fit. He didn’t like the style of suit, nor did he like the color.
So what was I to do? Change all the wedding colors to meet his needs this late in the game? Though we found some way to compromise (we kept the color and changed the style), I have now come to realize that even though he said he didn’t care, he really did.
Tips to Include Him in the Wedding Planning Process
Of course, there are some ladies who have “groom-zillas” that want to be involved in the entire process. But, for those of us whose fiancés simply brush off the planning process, it is important to find ways to include him along the way. Here are some great ideas to help you out.
Print out a wedding checklist and divide responsibilities. Maybe he can be in charge of clothing for the groomsmen, choosing a menu and renting limo services while you handle the frills and thrills of your big day?
Create a Binder/Scrapbook
Another way in which he can be a part of the wedding planning process is to create a wedding binder or scrapbook. As you find ideas or suggestions, find pictures and place them in this book. Show your fiancé every now and again to see what he thinks. This way, he can provide input.
Make Final Decisions Together
In practicing to be a married couple, decision making should be done together. So even if you have your heart set on a pink wedding, make sure he won’t have a problem with that before proceeding.
Your wedding day is for both of you to look back on and remember for a lifetime.
Don’t cut him out of the planning process, even if he somehow makes you feel like he wants no parts at all. Instead, get creative